


Dipper Dysphoria Blues

by orphan_account



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: M/M, Trans Dipper Pines, fidds especially. he is a very hard character to write, fidds n ford are very much a thing n there are a lot of cute moments but the fic isnt ABOUT them, ford pines is a good uncle, i came up w/ the idea for this fic when i was vry dysphoric lmao, i just cant put them in the same room without them being gay, im genuinely NOT a writer im sorry if this sucks. im doing my bestjdfoihfuid, its just mcgucket helping dipper feel better, rated T cuz there are like 6 swear words, this is anon purely bcuz i dont want my friends to find it and know how bad at writing i am lmaoo, this is my first time writing any of these characters its probably VERY oocs, trans elder moments, trans fiddleford mcgucket, tw dysphoria. obvs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 05:55:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26468305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: dipper is feeling awfully dysphoric, ford goes to find someone who he thinks can help.
Relationships: Dipper Pines & Ford Pines, Fiddleford H. McGucket/Ford Pines
Comments: 3
Kudos: 68





	Dipper Dysphoria Blues

“Dipper... Are you okay?”

Dipper, infact, was laying on his stomach with his face buried into his pillow when Ford pushed open his door, blinds closed, lights off. The peak of tween angst. The only reply he seemed to be able to muster was a muffled, whiny, “ _mmff…_ ” 

_Oh jesus…_ ford might have been in a little bit over his head.

Ford tried to gently sit next to the boy, the creak of the incredibly cheap bed frame underneath him, “dip-”

“It's not fair great uncle Ford!” dipper whipped himself half-over, leaning up on elbows that were-halfway under the pillow he had clearly been crying into a second ago. 

“What's not fair, dipper?”  
  


“I- i- that i have to live like this! That every month for the rest of m- my dumb life im gonna wake up with ruined clothes an- and a gross reminder of my stupid _stupid_ body!” 

Ford looked visibly confused as he sat for a moment, clearly having trouble grasping what he meant. “Im sorry, i don't understand?”

“I-” oh, he was tearing up again. “I started my first… _period_ today….” he said the word quietly, like it made him sick to admit. 

Wha… OH. _oh…_ stan had told ford that the kids were… a little different, in that particular way, but to be fully honest he had completely forgotten. He never paid much attention to the gender of folks around him, and especially at that age, before puberty and such its not like you could tell how someone was born anyway. Sure dipper had a squeaky voice but every 13 year old did. 

“it s just it-” oh, stanford had been quiet for too long “its not _fair!_ I- its just another stupid reminder that my body is wrong… I feel like im never gonna get to be a real man…” and like that, his head was in his pillow again.

  
_Oh jesus. Ford was definitely in over his head._

“Woahh, hey now, you’re- its- you just-” _think Stanford, think! Do you have ANY experience with this?? Anything to say?? It feels familiar but you don't remember specifics or why… OF COURSE!_ “Dipper, i know this may seem out of the blue, but i think i need you to talk to someone.” 

A sniff, and the slight tilt of the head from where it was hidden, letting dipper peak an eye towards his grunkle. “Ford… i don’t really want anybody to see me right now…”

“I’ll be quick, i promise, and its practically out of town so you won't have to see anybody you don't want to.” a pause “i know its hard, but you trust me, right?” 

Another pause, dipper wasn't looking at him, but he also hadn’t hidden his face yet. “...okay.”

Ford held back a grin, instead responding with a soft smile. “Okay.”

  
  
  


“The northwest manor…?” dipper leaned his face against the window, peering outwards towards the mansion nestled at the top of the hill.

“Nope.”

  
‘Wh- then where are we-?”

“We are going to the manor, but the northwests haven't lived there since last summer. Someone _much_ more important does now.”

Dipper looked visibly confused, but said nothing, putting trust in his uncle to not fuck him over in anyway, the pair leaving their car and making their way up the hill in silence. 

A quick wrapping of knuckles again a needlessly fancy door, followed by just enough silence to be awkward. Ford cleared his throat, “ha… big house…” before gently knocking again.

Dipper paused for a moment, before noticing something that seemed to stand out, a silver doorbell that contrasted the old wood, glimmering slightly. He leaned onto his toes to press it. 

An UPSETTINGLY loud chime rang out from the house, more akin to a ringing alarm clock than a usual doorbell sound, the pair winced at the noise for a moment as it took its time to finish ringing. Just a second after it did, they were met with a familiar face.

A man in his thirties peered down at dipper, the small tilt of his head being the only indicator he was passing glances between the two, as his hat was drawn low over his long face, making it impossible to see his eyes. He paused quietly, before tilting his head around and calling back into the house, loud but comfortably monotone. “Dad. Fords here.” 

An immediate sound of what could be described as _ruckus_ rang nearby, akin to cartoon pots and pan noises as someone in another room scrambled over things, the sound of a door opening, the sound of someone running down stairs, ford seemed to smile. 

In a moment a _very_ familiar face scrambled over the railing of a long spiral staircase towards the back of the (very large) room, seemingly impation to walk all the way down. As he made his way to the door, dipper recognized him as no other than Fiddleford McGucket. 

He looked different than he remembered, his long messy beard trimmed down to a considerably more reasonable length, he was wearing a SHIRT for the first time since dipper had met him, and had dumped his old worn overalls for a much more clean looking pair of blue jeans. That also had overalls. His posture seemed to be considerably better as well, but not proper yet, and he still seemed to enjoy occasionally breaking into an all-fours sprint for a moment every once in awhile. As he moved he pulled his goggles up his face onto his forehead, revealing an actual pair of glasses underneath, he must have gotten them prescribed since dipper had last seen him. 

“Stanferd!” he grinned, wiping some engine grease off of his cheek as he reached the door, immediately pulling the taller man into a hug. 

The named man grinned just as wide, returning the hug “Hello, fiddleford!” 

Tate and dipper were silent. 

“Oh, Stanferd! I’ve GOT to show you what i'm workin’ on this week! I've been fiddlin’ around with the processors on my old-”  
  


Dipper cleared his throat. 

“Eh-? Oh! Sorry there dipper!” he laughed a little nervously, fiddling with his fingers as he took a step back from his old friend, dipper could have sworn he might have been blushing. “Howdy to you to!” he knelt down slightly, reminding dipper of how he used to stand before. “Long time no see, youngin! I see yer back for the summer!” 

“Uhhhm,, haha, yea,,” he stuffed his hands in his pockets, glancing away awkwardly. Why had he let grunkle ford take him here today… he felt gross, and bad, and _seen._ He didn't like being seen right now, he felt like if they looked too close they’d be able to tell that he wasn’t what he said he was, like they’d just be able to look closer at him and _know_. 

“Oh, right.” Ford spoke up just as Mcgucket's face started to fall, picking up on the energy of the 13 yr old, he glanced back. “Fidds, I was wondering if me and Dipper could talk to you.” 

Fiddleford straightened his back (best he could, anyway) and nodded towards ford, silently understanding. Man, it was weird seeing mcgucket look so _serious_. He glanced back towards his son, who quickly nodded before stepping back, slipping into a hallway off the main room, seemingly taking a hint. Fiddleford took a step and gestured for the pines to follow him inside. 

Glancing around it was very obvious that mcgucket had been living in the home for nearly a year, it still definitely held the _air_ of being a rich people mansion with whatever kind of fancy rich people wood it was built out of being the main attraction, but all the old northwest paintings were gone. Fancy tables and furniture were littered with bits and pieces of scrap metal and circuit boards, wires lined the edges of the room, plugged into clearly recently installed sockets, dipper doesn't doubt they were installed by mcgucket himself. The fancy glass chandeliers were replaced with metal replicas, bright light bulbs screwed into the ends. An air of modernity breathed into the old, probably haunted, manor.

The trio moved through the home, stepping down a hallway into one of the many rooms, but this one considerably smaller than the entry parlor, decorated with a robot that seemed to be a _pterodactyl_ huddled in the corner, half-covered by an old sheet. Dipper would be tempted to comment on it, if he could stomach his own voice right now. Instead letting mcgucket silently lead them to a small table, in the center of the room.

Fiddleford was the first to sit down, finding a very casual normal way of sitting in his chair, feet on the ground. Ford and Dipper followed in suit. Mcgucket sat for a moment, before starting to practically squirm, trying to find a comfortable way to sit, uncrossing and crossing his legs, before resigning to lifting up his knees to his chest and leaning forward, resting his hands on the top of his knees. Old habits never die. 

“Fiddleford,” ford spoke up “I know we’ve already talked about it since i got back, but how is your memory doing? Specifically childhood memories?”

  
“Oh y'know, its coming along. It's all mostly back now! There are still some fuzzy bits but i imagine that's just what comes with aging.” he smiled a little casually, ford did for a moment in return, dipper did not. 

“Thats great to hear. I was- wondering if maybe you could talk to dipper about a part of your childhood, something you shared with me back in college.”

“y’Gonna have to be a bit more specific than that, ford, i shared a lotta things with you.”

“I know, I know i… i just don't know the right words to say and i don't want to- make him feel worse.” 

Fiddleford glanced towards Dipper, Dipper wished he wouldn’t. “Well, lookin at him i don't think you could make him feel much worse, boy looks like a bullfrog what when the pond dried up, unless he wants to tell me himself..?”

Dipper looked away, he did not. The thought of saying his ‘problem’ outloud made him want to throw up.

Ford sighed, steeling himself for a moment. “Fiddleford, do you… um… do you remember that time i walked in on you in the shower by accident?” 

Fiddleford coughed on his own spit, dipper gave ford an absolute _look._ One to say _‘are you kidding me, do i need to hear this???’_

“S- stanford, do we- _do we need to talk about this near the kid?”_

“NOT-! _Not that time!!!”_ dipper wanted to crawl into a fucking hole and die.

“I meant like- that time after we had just moved into the dorm, a couple months after we met, and I came into the bathroom because I was half asleep and overworked because I was studying for my exams, and I saw you and I freaked out.” 

McGucket paused for a moment, still visibly a little flustered and confused, before realization seemed to him over the head like a frying pan. “Oh- oh you mean-” he glanced back towards dipper, a little wide eyed. “You don’t mean to tell me that Dipper has the same… sit-ee-ation, do you?” 

Ford simply nodded. 

“I see… i see…” 

Dipper was very confused. 

“Exactly the same as mine, or what the opposite way ‘round?”

  
  
“Same as yours.”

  
‘Alright, i know how to work with that. Dipper.” Dipper glanced to him. “I think I understand what's happening with you, you're thirteen, right?

“Almost fourteen..”

  
“Of course, of course, and i can imagine your bodies goin through some… changes?”

  
  
“McGucket i don't need you to tell me about pu-”

  
  
“Let me finish, boy! Your body is goin’ through some _changes._ Ones that you feel- ones you know aren’t the _right type_ of changes, right?”

Dipper paused, understanding seemed to hit his mind, _no fucking way…_

“What if i told you i know exactly how those- those _wrong_ changes feel?”

  
  
“You- you’re-?”

  
  
“I dont know the fancy schmancy words you kids’ve got for it today, but if you’re ‘bout to ask if i was born as somebody other than Fiddleford Mcgucket you’re correct.

  
  
“Wh- w- _you!?_ But you’re- you’re old! How did you even-”

  
  
“Long story short, that voice changin’ potion wasn’t the only potion i've made to change your body, back when i was a kid figuring out the chemical makeup for testosterone wasn’t the hardest thing in the world! That and a _lotta_ gaslightin’ my parents into thinkin they never actually had a daughter and i was set! Been living as a man since!”

"you- you have a son!?"

"Tate is one of them whatcha-ma-call-its... testube babies? a lotta gene splicing and mad science went into that boy!"  
  


Dipper gaped “w- wh- you- y-”

  
“My point, dipper.” he lifted a hand to cut him off, dipper closed his mouth. “Is i remember what it was like being in yer shoes. It wasn't fun, feels yer whole body is goin’ against ya, forcing ya into a place you don't want to be, doing _weird_ thing and _growing_ weird bits, and it feels like you’ll never get out. But i promise you will. Especially now! I mean, yer parents obviously are letting you be a boy right? Let you dress how you want, call yerself what you want? I imagine getting that fancy ‘hormone therapy’ they got nowadays will be a peach! And if not they got stuff nowadays to _stop_ yer natural puberty before it starts, if yer parents are real hardasses and want you to wait.

Its gonna suck for a while, and you’re gonna doubt yerself, doubt if you get to be a ‘real man.’ but you’re gonna get to an age you forget any part of ya wasn't male to begin with, and its usually quicker than ya think. Besides, have ya seen yer uncles? How you take t’ testosterone is all genetic and fortune says yer lucky as hell! Luckier than me, anyway, i got short people genes.” he snickered. Dipper realized he was smiling. 

“Thank you, mcgucket…” 

Ford grinned, fully this time.

“No problem, kid!” dipper had no time to pull back before his hat was lifted up and his hair was ruffled. Both men seemed to be happy at the laugh and the playful “hey, cut it out!” that worked out of dipper. 

  
  
  


“Thank you again, Fidds.”

  
  
“No problem at all, y’know im happy to help.”

  
  
“Of course, wouldn’t expect anything less from you.”

  
  
“Now you two dont be strangers, now! Its been 30 years and one boat trip too long since we’ve seen each other, pines, i expect to see you in my workshop soon!”

Ford laughed, “of course, of course! How does tomorrow sound?”

  
  
“Mighty fine by me.”

  
  
Dipper watched the exchange, and then the quiet moment of silence that followed, the subtle lean of ford towards his old friend, and he very noticeably rolled his eyes. 

“Dipper, could you maybe wait outside for a moment-”

  
  
“Grunkle Ford, if you want to kiss him goodbye you can, i don't care.” 

Both men lit up bright red like christmas lights, stumbling over each other in half-baked excuses that were only kind-of sentences, before grunkle ford started quickly pushing dipper by his back out of the house “WELL! It was nice seeing you McGucket!! See you tomorrow!”

“Will do, Stanferd, will do!” the sound of the large door slamming rang loudly behind them. 

  
  
  


“Hey ford?”

A long sigh, “yes, dipper?”

“Thanks man.” 

Ford paused from where he had been taking his key out of the ignition. Before smiling. “Anything for my great nephew.  
  
“To be honest, for a moment i was worried you would tease me about me and Mcguckets… friendship more.”

“Nah, dont worry.” he paused, clicking open his car door. “Mabel will do that for me.”

  
  
“Wait wha-!?”

  
  
But he was already sprinting inside the mystery shack, grinning as he went to go share the gossip with his sister. 

Ford would be upset, if he weren’t already too happy to see his nephew up and about again. Making fun of him or not. 

**Author's Note:**

> hope the niceness of this fic makes up for the fact its NOT well written lmao. ty 4 reading this mess <3!!


End file.
